Today I wanted to take the time out to articulate part of our journey, and how I use name medicine to guide us. What is in a name? We have our born day names. My name is Nichole, meaning Victorious Heart. My heart eye leads me. It’s as if the name is all the chakras unified in the heart. A name is medicine, and it is a journey towards oneself.
We have a family name medicine. The Wolf Pack. Loyal, leaders, tightly knit, respectful of each other’s roles. Enduring, patient, loving, playful. Family medicine.
Our homeschool name is Eagle Tree. I developed the name as my children began guiding me towards schooling at home, the place of liberation and free learning. I have spent time with many Elders. My own grandparents were a fixture in my young life, and as I grew, more Elders appeared. I was ready. One great teaching I learned is the teaching of time and space, the teaching of the Long Vision, and the dance that is done on the journey.
A name is medicine, and I chose Eagle Tree. My boys are eaglets perched in our family tree. Not only are my husband and I the tree, the roots, the foundation and the Tenders of the family flame, we are the eagle parents as well. We are holding space for the Long Vision. The Spirit of the turtle taught me this wisdom. Slow and steady, no rush. It’s the archetype of Grandmother. And so I found Grandmother Nichole, across time and space and she has helped Nichole the Maiden step into the shoes of Nichole the Mother. And now Grandmother Nichole has helped me step once again through the portal of the eclipses. I am in a new place, within the Long Vision. Ironically, the turtle could give me this wisdom, because turtle lives within the eagle. Eagles pick turtles up off the ground carry them high up, drop them, crack them open and eat them. So the Spirit of the turtle lives within the Spirit of the Eagle. As do we All live within the Collective Conscious. We are One. And we always and forever have the ability to understand one another.
Over time, since the birth of Eagle Tree School, I have been helping my boys learn to Trust the Long, Keen Vision. The Greater Good of our journey. The place where there is No Rushing. Only Presence. It’s messy in reality, because that is the lower energy of the 3rd dimension (we really spend more time in the 5th), where we must live out our Vision. It’s the Higher Realm which is our guide, our council, and from where we “bring down” the energy and spiritualize matter.
Because we are and are not fully in control, sometimes things align differently than we hope. But that’s because our higher self can See clearer. Like the Eagle. We are more like mice some days. Our face, nose and eyes to the ground, living among the details. Those dreadful, distracting details. We must live between the worlds when we can to find a balance. Not always so close to the ground. Not always so high up above our real lives. But right in the middle, being the divine light body we truly are, directing our higher and lower consciousness.
Endurance is what our lower selves learn, and patience. We learn to dance the journey, and persevere. Our higher selves want to taste the sensory of this world. The dirt, the sex, the food, the love, the loneliness, the blood of natural pain, time even. There is so much to understand within the realm of Love. There is a Long Vision.
What is in a name? A great deal of medicine. A wonderful story. Wisdom.
I just finished visiting Amber Hellewell’s blog, Hearth Magic – She is looking for magic, and she had a brilliant thought, in her latest post The Curse of the Main Lesson Book (MLB). It actually reminded me of several things Julie, from Bravewriter has said recently. Ok, I am going to say it. We have Main Lesson Book burnout. It may be more than burnout. We moved this year, as I have mentioned in recent posts. We have kept up as many lessons as we can on certain days of the week, dedicated to Main Lesson studies. But, my main goal is to stay essential, and reach the child in any creative way I can.
This past year with moving I will admit some of my burdens and stresses have been on the unknown. How this move will turn out? Will the boys eventually go to public school? And many more personal questions. There are wonderful things happening and being revealed to us each week, but we have been carrying other invisible burdens that have affected our daily lives. For one, we are All changing, and how we express ourselves is changing. This isn’t a burden, it’s actually a gift, but the change is taxing. We need more rest. We need to honor ourselves more in this part of the journey. Here’s how I really feel at the moment.
How well will I learn this lesson at the moment? Will I receive it? How open will I be in allowing myself to transform in the chrysalis, and how much will it hurt emerging through to the other side? Will I recognize myself? Is it me stepping toward my Truth and Real Self. I do believe that is part of it. As a teacher, mama, visionary, woman, warrior, healer, I recognize there is deep healing going on. In the Waldorf pedagogy, one begins to recognize head, hearts and hands as a healing philosophy. It’s a vehicle for healing. That’s what I love about it. The ultimate lesson for us is learning to create, manifest, dream and make those dreams real. Love, forgiveness, compassion, grace all happen to be part of the healing and manifesting.
I have always tried to honor my boys, when it comes to their gifts and challenges. But, lately this past year our struggle has been with the Main Lesson Book. Keeping up with it so rigorously is very stressful. Partly because of our temperaments. Partly because I need to find a process which allows the true writer within us to emerge. Our process needs to change right now. We need to enter into the intuitive writer within ourselves. If I do not do this right now for myself and our children, I pass the portal-the gateway that is being offered to us, and ceremoniously reflected (mirrored) to us in our struggles. Like Amber says of her oldest child, he loves retelling her the stories with excitement. And, he loves drawing his own stories. We each have our gifts, but this way is best for him at the moment. I honor Amber for Seeing this in her child.
My children have their strengths and vulnerabilities. One of my guys is a valiant storyteller and artist. He can write stories, but has struggled and grown, because he is unafraid to make mistakes, or to fail. One of my guys is much more reserved in his storytelling and writing. He has a rich inner world though. Part of my trickster-teacher-mama inner-work and guidance must figure out a way to get him to write fluidly, without overthinking the perfectionism, the mechanical. It makes a person frozen, and we have to figure out a way to unfreeze and allow that water to flow. I believe beginning grammar and mechanics too early will hinder some temperaments. Children need to be unafraid to write, without the distraction. I mean how many of you want to write a blog post/a book, but never start for fear of All the Things. Something I keep hearing over and over in many circles, and whispers in my ear, Journal. Journaling can be the gateway. It’s intuitive. Blogging is my way of journaling and communicating. Why, because I have a need within me to do so, and I want to share and serve my community in a way related to the Arts.
I added the above meditation for you and me. I can really Feel that many of you are experiencing an open third eye at this time, but it’s the throat chakra that is needing the clearing. Perhaps the throat chakra of our school, Eagle Tree needs clearing as well. Our school is an organism, and I at times must meditate, pray, and get out of my own way. This is what the Teacher does. Importantly, this is what Humans must do. Get out of our own way. I want to give you a practical list below on ways you can get out of your own way right now, and open up your throat chakra. Your communication chakra for yourself, and for the organism that is your homeschool and family!
1.Use your voice, or as my littlest one has recently been saying “boice.” Synchronicity. Over the past couple weeks my little guy has just been repeating or saying out loud the word “boice.” He is contemplating his own voice. Our voices. The yelling voices. The whispering voices. The singing voices. The storytelling voices. Use your voice in a fresh, creative way. Sing, chant, hum or whistle. Chant in the shower, whistle as you do your chores, hum to yourself as you cook. Use your pipes!
2. Use your mouth in other ways. Scream! It’s fun. Laugh! Yawn. Kiss. Groan. Sigh. Stick your tongue out far in Lion Pose.
3. Pick up a musical instrument. A kazoo. A flute. A harmonica!
4. Play some music! If playing a musical instrument is not your thing, crank some tunes next time you are cooking, gardening, running, driving or hanging out. Sing-along. Listen to whatever you enjoy!
5. Clean Food. I follow the tarot, because I believe it is a unique way to follow my intuition through artistic renderings of the archetypes. One has been popping up for me lately and that is Clean Food. It is meant for our whole family. Recently, loads of happy mail came from my mom and Amazon. A gluten-free artisan bread recipe book. I have seen examples of my friends success with it on IG. The Medical Medium book has had synchronicity in aiding the throat chakra/thyroid area. I am using Anthony Williams protocol, as a nice guide for healing the body all the way, deep, deep down to our tiny little cells and tissues. I’m aiming to transform. The butterfly will be here soon.
6. Journal. Expressing yourself on paper is one of the most cathartic things you can do to release your inner truth. Write letters to yourself. Write letters to your children. Write notes to your spouse or partner. Write a blog. Write a book! Write out your dreams, wishes, gratitudes, desires, and inner feelings.
One thing I am going to do today is listen to an audio and then write out my business/family vision in detail. I am going to give as much detail to it as I can and cover a range of 10 years. I am taking a Visionary Business Introductory Course, via Daily Om. Journaling is one of the best ways to invite spontaneous insight, understanding and growth into our lives. It is truly a way to dig deeper. And as I have mentioned in my Instagram Stories, it is truly a time of deep ancestral healing. How are we living our truth? How are we healing across time and space? We are the ones we have been waiting for mamas. I know you have heard that before. We are great healers and teachers. Now is the time to break those karmic contracts we did not sign up for. The ways we act, the limiting beliefs, the self-loathing, the inability to Slow down and walk in beauty, as my old teacher Grandmother Jeremie would say. Let’s walk in beauty and allow our children the space they need, the occasional push they need, the creative outlets that works for each of them. It is a hard job, it is a job for creatives. But, we signed up for it. As a matter of fact, we eagerly placed ourselves here and now, for This Job.
So, weeks back we tossed off the Main Lesson Books, and began to walk the Path of Peace. Well, not all days were peaceful. There were some fights, miscommunications, misunderstandings, hormones (teen and adult), tears, some laughter, some singing, loootttsss of breathing, as much sleep as possible. Super clean food, which is Loads of work. Exhausting some days. My life is messy, hard, and challenging. I have three free-spirited boys with different learning abilities. I have my own sensitivities, challenges and demands. It doesn’t make me a worse-case for the job, because of my stressors. It makes me the perfect person for the job, if I am willing to look darkness and change in the face. I may cry. I may need more sleep. I may look like a ragged warrior or even perhaps Shield Maiden coming off the field of battle, but I have never backed down from a job. I may Shift, or change footing, but I am up for this healing life I have been called to.
How’s that for expressing my throat chakra. (cackles like a witch.)
As I find myself coming to the end of one cycle with Happy Hedgehog Post as a Brand Rep, new adventures are arising for our family. Sometimes adventures happen very quickly, and the next thing you know, you are putting one foot in front of the other. For my family, we are finding that after almost 11 years (in May 2017), we are picking up roots and replanting ourselves. We have been blooming and growing in Kentucky. We married in North Carolina and had our first son, Little Eagle. Then, we moved to Kentucky and immediately got pregnant with Little Fox. About 7 years later I got pregnant with Little Bear. So most of our children’s Early Childhood, walking the Waldorf inspired path, has been in one place. Now it is time to go on a new adventure together. We are moving to Amish Country, in Northern Indiana. Life will be different. We have lived on almost 4 acres in the country for the past 11 years, but we are moving into a rental (temporarily) in town. It is a quaint town, where I can walk to yoga and the farmer’s market within 5 minutes. There is a 26 acre park right in town as well. And, grandma lives a few streets over. At some point we will move back out to the country, once we find the right place. UPDATED to add : We have found a place to live and a workshop for our family business!
Meanwhile, I have been asked by Amber at Hearth Magic to review her lovely two-part PDF download that she has listed on Etsy. Tonight I downloaded and previewed the learning guide. It is very thorough. Our journey will include reading The Hobbit one chapter at a time and doing crafts, activities and pairing that with food! I am not sure who is more excited, the kids or me!
So! Over the next couple months, as we move and settle in, I hope to post some of our adventures. Our journey. Until then, head over to Etsy and check out Amber’s listing. If anything Favorite her listing, as you stay tuned to see more of my review.
Good day folks! Join me over on Instagram for a GIVEAWAY of this lovely piece, called Full Circle, pattern by Cozy Blue. I want to share LIGHT and KINDNESS with this GIVEAWAY, so LIKE and TAG a friend in the COMMENTS. GIVEAWAY closes, Monday, December 26th, at 4p.m. My children will choose a winner!
August paid off with planning, and our rest, travel and play enriched us enough to focus daily on our tasks for the past month and a half. We began our new school year, as year rounders back in April. So when September hit, we were beginning the final stretch after a break. I make sure we are learning with in and out breaths, developing the best process for our heads, hearts and hands. That is how we came naturally to schooling this way. Intuition, meditation, prayer, focus, intent, manifestation.
Deepening our painting skills, we have learned a bit about Botany, with the Charles Kovac book. Geography skills have been expanded through music lessons, stories, and real life experience. I have learned more about the Old Testament stories by taking them in to my Soul and teaching, which has in turn helped me to become a more multi-dimensional teacher. It helps that I used one set of resources the first time I taught 3rd, and another set of resources this second time around. Waldorf Essentials has always been my lamp post though! 5th grade has taken us to Ancient Egypt, Ancient Greece and into the lap of Buddha. Teaching 3rd and 5th at the same time has its teacher incentives, when subjects become intermingled. In other words, I have begun to deepen my own personal web of life. Everything is interrelated.
Our handwork rhythm has deepened and that makes me proud. Needle Point (with yarn) and Embroider (with thread/floss) has enriched our Souls using our Hands. Freehand Geometry is taking shape through a few Waldorf resources and I am having fun presenting the sacredness of the universe through Math, to my little learner. I intend to join the embroidering world and math in the next cycle of my teaching. I have a great recommendation for a book assisting with this, on my IG account. Also, please take a look at my personal embroider work project, which is stitch by stitch prayers for the Standing Rock Reservation against the Dakota Access Pipeline #nodapl – It is a pattern by @cozyblue, called Full Circle. This can be found #WIP style on IG.
Another one of my little learners will play in his 5th Suzuki violin recital in a couple weeks, And he is blossoming in our Cooking Class. So many good things. My littlest learner is unfolding beautifully in our Waldorfy prek circle, at my home church. The Circle Time was taken on by our Children’s Minister, in which we are so grateful. Once a week for an hour and a half we get together with 5/6 other families to sing, sign, hear stories, do crafts, move, shake and laugh. We come as we are, 2 to 4 years of age, at the moment. So many good things are evolving for the Wolf Pack, and Eagle Tree Homeschool. Teaching 3 age levels at the same time is a challenge, but with self care, time management, organization and Love as the centerpiece, it can be done.
If you are interested in speaking with me about my experience with Waldorf Essentials, I am now a (TFW) Thinking, Feeling, Willing Leader. Please comment below or contact me healingoneself@gmail.com. TFW is a blessing and gives you access to organized, essential mama lessons. Not only will Melisa hold your hand, if you are willing to do the inner work, but I will be nearby local, in Kentucky. It helps to have community.
If I have already referred you to Melisa and WE and you would like to be added to my secret Facebook group, just message me. I will add you. I plan to post videos, links to songs I sing for Circle Time or the Seasons and personal wisdom on homeschooling, mothering, marriage, and being self-employed (see www.coydogstudios.com and on IG @coydog~studios).
I also have a secret Facebook group for Handwork, if you wish to message me, I will add you there as well.
I have also organized homeschooling resources and other lifestyle pursuits over on Pinterest.
We have been using Waldorf Essentials curriculum for a number of years. I have taught both Kindy through Third twice, as well as Fourth and Fifth once through. I have had the honor to hold space for the preschool years three times, with my three sons, ages 11, 9 and now 3. Join me, if you wish and I will do my best to guide you as I can. Life is a journey, and we can take it day by day together.
In the bear’s cave of winter bubbles start to rise and pop in the dream space. The abyss is close by. The bear is sleepy, yet awake. The mind has dials set to meditate and welcomes symbols and messages that will give directional guidance. That bear is me, and the symbol that came was the Makara Mudra, as I set intention on India, and the spiritual practice of the body. As a teacher and a parent I have married the seasons, nature, Creator, my Self and the subjects in right-relationship. Our children came through me, so being a hollow bone during this time for them, as well as working on how I get in my own way is paramount. It’s contradictory, and the struggle is real.
I try to remain open to the messages that become my teachings. Mudra’s are hand gestures that can influence the energy of the body. The Makara Mudra is a blessing, as it activates a resevoir of energy. Winter is a time when we may activate that reservoir of energy to pull through a time of low energy, depression or overburdened tasks. Makara is the name of a crocodile in Indian mythology. Crocodiles are known for their strength, which can be mobilized very quickly. Sometimes, many times I need access quickly to a reservoir of strength or energy as a mama. Don’t you?!
January and February, as well as a few months into the school year are times when I have spread myself thin, or perhaps have not received the proper rest it takes to teach and parent and own a business. When I looked into the Mudra that I intuitively chose I knew immediately Creator wished for me to know the gesture. I am learning so much, and in doing so I am planning out the year for the boys. We are starting to embrace yoga more daily and I am researching some dancing, so we may bring our teachings to the body. The whole child.
Here is a link if you would like to look further into the Makara Mudra.
After weeks of hard work and memorizing lines, we culminate tonight and tomorrow watching Robin Hood! Little Eagle plays Will Scarlett, a very Merry Man.
Our Little Bear bundled up and walked a big circuit today. This is one of the first times he hasn’t had to be pulled, pushed or carried. A new season of movement! A season of feeling his feet on the land and looking up at the sky, the trees, and the winged ones in new awareness.
Soon we will hear the story of The Festival of Stones, by Reg Downs, and its winter stone magic. If mama wants to sing around the house, while washing dishes, or folding laundry, here is a recording to go by. Include drums if you have them!
It is winter, but here in Kentucky we have only had a light dusting of snow and mild temperatures so far. My duty is to Remember my Self through the seasons. In winter, all the energy goes inward. Into the roots of the trees, into the stones and bones of the earth. Stones are our libraries of the past. Pick one up and see if it has a message or story for you. If you listen, or keep it on your altar long enough, you might pick up some of it’s wisdom and healing intention. Are you drawn to any particular stones right now? Do you have a mantra for this winter season?
All words, ideas and photos are copyrighted within this blog, from the beginning to the present, and in my existing accounts and links that I share. If you wish to share my stuff with others or elsewhere, please contact me. Let Respect lead us.
Nurturing Spirit 